Contributions

You have no posts

We reward new content.

START POST

Whoo Knew

No replies

Share your opinion on topics.

CONVERSATIONS

Contests

No entries

Win gift cards and more.

Your Profile

FOLLOWERS

0

Users

POINTS EARNED

0

REDEEM

Happiness Tuesdays

Faith, Something to Believe in

Why Should We Forgive?

Everyone of us has been hurt at some point in our lives - some worse than others. But if we choose to, it can be very easy to hold onto the hurt. Forgiving someone is not an easy thing to do - but it can truly be what sets you free.

Forgiveness is a personal decision - but it can bring a HUGE range of benefits, both for the person offended, and the offender. Here are some reasons why forgiveness is so important:

  1. It can help you let go of negative feelings: Holding onto anger, resentment, or bitterness towards someone who has wronged you can be emotionally draining and may impact your mental health. Forgiveness can help you let go of these negative feelings and move on with your life.
  2. It can promote better relationships: Forgiveness can help repair damaged relationships and improve communication between individuals. When you forgive someone, you may be more willing to listen to their perspective and work towards finding a solution to the problem.
  3. It can improve your physical health: Studies have shown that holding grudges can have negative physical effects on the body, such as increased blood pressure and heart rate. Forgiveness, on the other hand, has been linked to improved immune function and decreased stress levels.
  4. It can be a way of practicing empathy and compassion: Forgiveness involves putting yourself in someone else’s shoes and trying to understand their actions. It can be a way of showing empathy and compassion towards others, even if you don’t agree with what they did.
  5. It can help you grow as a person: Forgiving someone can be a challenging process that requires strength, courage, and humility. By practicing forgiveness, you may develop a greater sense of self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and personal growth.

As you can see, there are great benefits to forgiveness. However, that does not make it easy. It’s a choice that you have to make - sometimes daily to practice forgiveness.
 

Recommended Book

The Book of Forgiving

Apr 07, 2015
ISBN: 9780062203571

Interesting Fact #1

By forgiving others, you increase your capacity to be more compassionate and understanding.

SOURCE

Interesting Fact #2

Forgiving a person for bad behavior does not condone what they did.

SOURCE

Interesting Fact #3

An apology isn’t necessary for you to forgive that person.

SOURCE

Quote of the day

“Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart.” ― Corrie Ten Boom

Article of the day - 3 Big Ways Forgiveness Is Good for Your Health

Reaching a place where you’re able to forgive someone — whether that be another person or yourself — can be extremely difficult. But the toll not doing so takes on your body makes being able to forgive a very important skill to have.

According to Everett L. Worthington Jr., PhD, Commonwealth Professor Emeritus at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond, whose psychology research has focused on forgiveness, the way people reach a state of true forgiveness differs, but usually falls into two categories: decisional forgiveness and emotional forgiveness. 

“You can experience a change in your emotion, and then decide to forgive, or you can decide to forgive first and experience those changes emotionally later on,” Dr. Worthington says.

Because our relationships are so crucial to health, being able to forgive, and communicate to others that you have forgiven them, will benefit your and their health. In this respect and in many others, Worthington says: “Mental health is directly related to physical health.”

More specifically, here are three big, evidence-backed ways that forgiveness (or the act of not forgiving) affects our health.

1. Forgiveness Helps You Manage Stress

Not being able to forgive fosters feelings of anger, hostility, and stress, which are well documented to impact mental and physical health, past research shows.

study published in April 2016 in the journal Annals of Behavioral Medicine included more than 330 people ages 16 to 79. The researchers found that regardless of age, people who were able to forgive experienced a decrease in their perception of their own stress. And this decrease led to a decrease in psychological distress.

“Although forgiveness is not the only strategy available for coping with adversity, according to this model of forgiveness, it is one of the more effective responses for reducing stress perceptions and enhancing health,” the study authors noted.

RELATED: Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Stress — Including How to Manage It

Conversely, stress — and particularly the stress hormone cortisol — has several negative effects on systems throughout the body. Chronically elevated cortisol can shrink the size of portions of your brain including the hippocampus, which is responsible for turning experiences into memories, Worthington says. It's because of this stress-cortisol link that not being able to forgive and let go of certain stresses could potentially affect memory, he adds.

In a study published in October 2018 in the journal Neurology, researchers investigated whether blood cortisol levels affected memory in more than 2,200 healthy middle-aged people. For the study, researchers measured blood cortisol levels, and compared it with participants’ scores on memory and visual perception tests, and gray matter levels in the brain as measured by brain scans (gray matter helps the brain process information). They found that people, especially women, who had high cortisol levels over time had poorer memory and performed worse on cognitive tests. Over time, they also appeared to have less gray matter in some parts of the brain.

Cortisol wreaks havoc elsewhere in the body, too. It affects the immune system at a cellular level, which means it can do widespread damage to all the parts of the body the immune system touches in unpredictable ways, Worthington explains. “It can disrupt everything from the sexual and reproductive system to the gastrointestinal system to your ability to fight off illness and fatigue,” says Worthington.

2. Forgiveness Activates the Parasympathetic Nervous System, Which Is Good News for Your Heart

According to Worthington, forgiveness affects the parasympathetic nervous system, too, which slows breathing and heart rate and increases digestion. It’s also known as “rest and digest” response (controlling ordinary bodily functions) — or the opposite of the stress fight-or-flight response (which prepares the body for more strenuous physical activity).

The sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems work together, so that your body can regulate things like blood pressure and heart rate, and function the way it should both in stressful situations and nonstressful moments. But when a person is under chronic stress — which can occur when someone is holding onto anger — the body may stay in the fight-or-flight response for too long.

“The parasympathetic nervous system is the calming part of the nervous system, so it turns off the hyperarousal of the specific areas,” says Worthington. Anything a person can do to calm themselves when carrying around a lot of stress activates the parasympathetic nervous system in this way (including practicing forgiveness), and can be helpful to the mind and body because it brings the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems more in balance.

There’s research to suggest indeed these effects may be significant in terms of affecting health outcomes, like cardiovascular function.

In a meta-analysis published in the Journal of the American College of Cardiology, researchers found that anger and hostility are linked to an increased risk of heart disease, as well as worse outcomes for people who already have it.

study published in the Journal of Behavioral Medicine examined forgiveness as a predictor of mortality, and found a statistically significant relationship. Forgiving others is associated with a decreased risk for all-cause mortality, the study authors noted.

3. Forgiveness Helps Your Ruminate Less (Which Can Help Lower Risk of Psychological Disorders)

According to Worthington, the act of not forgiving someone or refusing to forgive someone is almost always characterized by rumination, or playing something over and over in the mind. 

“We all ruminate, but the way that we ruminate is kind of individual. Some people do it angrily, some people ruminate hopelessly or feel depressed. Others do it anxiously,” Worthington says. And if rumination becomes habitual, it can lead to psychological disorders.

“Rumination is the universal bad boy of mental health,” Worthington adds.

Depending on your brand of rumination (whether you do it in a way that breeds hopelessness, depression, anxiety, or other feelings), these invasive, repetitive thoughts can eventually cause anger disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)anxietydepression, or psychosomatic disorders, in which stress and anxiety cause physical ailments like stomach pain or migraines

According to a study that included more than 1,800 Black adults, published in October 2019 in the Journal of the American Heart Association, Black women were more likely than Black men to experience more stressful life events and engage in rumination, which causes a sustained increase in hypertension over the 13 years the individuals were followed for the study. 

“When people are able to forgive, they still ruminate to some degree, but they are able to let go of a lot of that bitterness and anger,” says Worthington. “Forgiveness doesn’t eliminate rumination, but it can reduce the toxicity of it.”

Question of the day - What is something that you struggle to forgive?

Faith, Something to Believe in

What is something that you struggle to forgive?